I never thought I'd find myself the recipient of an e-mail full of vitriol and nastiness, but this morning I awoke to just that. Truly, I had to read it a few times, before I posted it on my private Facebook page to garner help from friends to solve the mystery. I'd never been called such names before, so surely I must have done something to evoke such a passionate email full of colorful language and grammatical errors. Nope, this person just emailed the wrong person and that "wrong person" happened to be none other than me. As it happens, I'm not one to gently and slowly back away and as such, I thought, let's use this little interaction to do some good in the world, shall we?
It all started this morning when my alarm went off at too-early-o'clock. I grabbed my phone to turn it off and noticed a brand new email: Subject: Your enabling irresponsible women (yes, "your" instead of "you're", but I digress.) I opened it to find this little gem:
Now, I'll admit that maybe I should have just deleted it and gone on with my life, but I also recognized that silence just begets satisfaction and could be misperceived as a willingness on my part to accept whatever has been thrown at me. Instead, this is how I chose to respond:
Dear J travers,
Waking up this morning to your e-mail was quite surprising and I’ll admit that I ended up posting a screenshot to my Facebook page because I had absolutely no idea what you were talking about. I mean, I've never been on Fox News before. I used the assistance of dear friends to figure out your mistake though! It makes complete sense that in your minimal search, you determined emailing me would be your easy button instead of taking notice that I’m not even in the same state as the organization you despise so much. Yep, you emailed the wrong place, as my business is not affiliated with another non- profit for homeless pregnant people.
Instead of getting angry and lashing out at you for sending this email to a complete stranger who has nothing to do with the non-profit, Birth Haven of New Jersey, I’d like to take the opportunity to say hello, and help you understand a bit more about what I do.
The Birth Haven in Kentucky is a premier doula agency providing birth and postpartum services to those in our area who are expecting a baby. A doula is a person providing paid supportive services to families who desire unparalleled professional support during pregnancy & the postpartum period. We are labor coaches and much more, providing comfort measures, calming new parents to be, and helping them get off to a great start. We also provide postpartum & infant care services- helping with overnight care so families can get much needed sleep and become more confident as brand new parents. We are also aware of the signs of postpartum depression and help people as they heal and recover from birth.
I suppose I am an enabler. An enabler of families making choices that are best for them! We are a luxury service who also finds helping others in need to be of vast importance, in fact we donated 18,000 diapers to families in our community last year and hope to double that this year!
Seeing as this is the season of giving, of love, of kindness, of compassion, and of helping those in need, I would like to thank you for introducing me to the amazing non-profit that shares my same name, where I will be sending a tax deductible donation in the coming days as a way to extend compassion to those in need. I am proud to be part of the solution instead of part of the problem. You may call that enabling or acting like a knight and shining armor, but I call it being human and extending grace to those around me.
I sincerely hope that the next time a news story appears that causes you such distress that you lash out on random strangers, you instead bottle it up and turn it into something more productive like having a cup of coffee with a friend and reliving good times or donating to a cause like No Child Wet Behind Kentucky!
Holiday cheer and blessings to you,
Julie- owner of The Birth Haven and according to you, douchebag
Want to extend kindness this holiday season in the name of our good friend J travers? We have a few ways in which to do so!
Birth Haven in New Jersey is an independent non-profit providing shelter, education, and support to pregnant people in Newton, NJ. They would love to accept any cash donations to assist in their ongoing support of people in their state. DONATE HERE
If you want to keep donations local and help The Birth Haven in Lexington, KY, please check out our No Child Wet Behind Kentucky Amazon gift registry and purchase diapers for our local beneficiary, The Nest. Although I wasn't planning on launching this years diaper campaign just yet, I felt this was the perfect opportunity to block out a scrooge and uplift our community. The registry can be found HERE if you wish to give.
Carry on and remember to be kind, love life, and snuggle those babies!
UPDATE: Although, I was never sure the person would ever e-mail back, I did receive a response, two in fact. The first one was actually an apology with a side of attempting to guilt me into feeling bad about shaming them for their "facts" and that I really need to shame where shame is due. This person was speaking of those pregnant homeless people, by the way.(insert eye roll)
The second email came just as I was reading the first one. Two minutes later to be exact. It was filled to the brim with disgusting rhetoric, name calling, and colorful language. Needless to say, the person apparently actually read the complete e-mail instead of the initial lines and really wanted to "give it to me". I've toyed with responding again and honestly don't think it's worth it. Instead, I'm getting back to work, supporting families in the bluegrass! Cheers!